Jardonn's Erotic Tales.com


His half-assed advice and old-time music blog


JULY 2009


7-1-09... Ah, the touch of another human can bring any one of dozens of emotions. If it's love, contact produces a peculiar contradiction -- heat that makes goosebumps. Such is the plight of Jeannie Seely, who in 1966 pleadingly expressed lyrics that are so cleverly realistic. She says, if you don't love me, Don't Touch Me.


7-3-09... Stating the obvious, we've had a rash of celebrities die on us lately. Frankly, I didn't know Karl Malden hadn't already passed. Seems he always looked old to me, was sporting a comb-over back in the 1950's. Luckily for all, each of these stars will always be available via film, which means we can remember them as they were in their prime, or any particular time of their lives we care to cherish.

Some entertainers, especially actors, have that extra something which demands our attention. Tonight during dinner I was scrolling through the television guide like always and saw The Wizard of Oz scheduled. There's a film that sucks me in every time. I tell myself I'll just watch the opening credits and listen to Somewhere Over the Rainbow, and then turn it off and go about whatever was originally planned. You know it's impossible to do. Once I hear the opening fanfare and see those larger-than-life actors, especially, in the opening scenes: Judy Garland, Bert Lahr, Charlie Grapewin and Margaret Hamilton, I'm hooked.

It is amazing how this movie is so deeply-ingrained to my brain. I'm sure it is the same for most of us. Once per year we'd get to see it, and as a child, the songs and images, fun and scary (the flying monkeys chill me still), stayed with me long after the lights were out as I laid in bed with eyes wide open, shadows transforming into the wicked witch and her monkeys. As an adult, I think I love this film even more. It seems every word of dialogue, every melody, every lyric, facial expression, line delivery, dance routine, edit, color and camera angle is just perfect. Couldn't have been done any better. Every possible element fell into place just so to make the most nearly-flawless two hours of cinematic story-telling ever created.

Take for example the Cowardly Lion. Who better could have played that role than Bert Lahr? Have you ever seen him in other films? He came from Vaudeville with those crazy voice sounds and over-the-top facial expressions his schtick. What worked on stage was too much on film, some of it actually embarrassing. Makes you squirm to watch it, but for the Cowardly Lion, his bombast is exactly what is needed, same as with the contortingly-limber limbs of Ray Bolger and protruding-cheekboned cheer of Frank Morgan, who bedazzles with each of his five roles.

Obviously, as always, I watched from beginning to end, and as always I will be humming and singing the songs for days to come. Each time the film ends I leave it uplifted, impressed and thankful that all these talented people came together in the ideal space and time to create a masterpiece. Every person involved is now dead, but like I've said before there really is no death, just a change of scenery. The Wizard of Oz was released in 1939, but it is not locked in a time capsule. Nothing has changed it; nothing has dated it; and nothing could be done to improve it.

That's film, but in face-to-face relationships, absence can make for sadness, especially when love is involved. Case in point -- Bill Withers can't see any sunlight when she's not around, and he tells all about it in a voice soulfully pained. Ain't No Sunshine


7-6-09... Genesis -- the beginning, origin. The creative power of thought is the genesis of all things that exist. With your thoughts you create the world surrounding you.

A stint in prison prompted Merle Haggard to get his head out of his ass and change the world surrounding him by making use of his voice, in its prime a naturally inspiring voice of richness with slight vibrato. No training necessary, it was all there given to him, waiting to be exploited, and we're glad he did. Here's one of his early hits from 1965, You Don't Have Very Far to Go


7-8-09... Juice kicks ass. Literally! Drinking aloe vera juice about every ten days cleans that crud off the inner lining of your colon -- crud that could form into polyps -- polyps that could become cancerous. Tastes like water with a touch of lemon. Pour a tumbler-sized glass full and send it where the sun doesn't shine.

Hank Snow is well aware he's headed for trouble down in that same area... inside his pants, but not the backside... the front. "It ain't no good, baby," he says. "You're already hooked up, and to continue carrying on with you would be like Doing 90 mph Down a Dead End Street."


7-10-09... The name Buck Owens is well-known. The name Don Rich is well-known only when coupled with Buck Owens, and it is appropriate their names should be spoken together, because when they sang, their two voices (Buck's melody and Don's harmony) worked as one.

I once read an interview with Buck Owens where he said the two of them were so tight, knew each other's tendencies so well, that even when Buck tried to throw Don off by synchopating a note a nano-second early, Don stayed right with him. It became an inside game between them during concerts, a game Don Rich always won.

Buck Owens and the Buckaroos came from the studio sessions in Bakersfield, CA, working as backups with Tommy Collins. Originally, Don Rich played fiddle, but switched to electric guitar and became even more proficient with that instrument. His quality picking and amazing voice of harmonies, which ranged from medium baritone to very high tenor, more than anything else became the signature sound associated with Buck Owens and the Buckaroos.

So partnered were the two men as friends, musicians and songwriters that when Don Rich was killed in a motorcycle accident in 1974, Buck Owens quit music. He was no fading star at the time, was still at the top of the charts, but Don's tragic death devastated him so badly he literally stopped. Understandable when your inspiration, your creative partner suddenly is no longer there. Of course, Buck Owens did eventually re-enter the music world, writing, singing and recording up until his death in 2006.

I'm offering two samples to showcase two men and their voices blending together as though one instrument. No studio tricks, they sang live before a single studio mic, just like they did it on the concert stage.

Sample one: I'll Give You Love. Sample two I first posted in March: Just as Long as You Love Me.


7-13-09... Did I ever mention the benefits of washing your mouth with salted water? It is amazing how it strengthens your gums and whitens your teeth. Much cheaper than those daily strips that use bleach, and it's painless. Simple. After brushing, rinse like your normally do, but for your final mouthful of water add about one-half teaspoon of salt (sea salt is better), stir it to dissolve it and slosh it around your gums and teeth for 15 seconds or so. This form of hygiene has been known forever, but rarely mentioned by the pro's because they make money selling you the fancy stuff.

If your teeth are sensitive like mine, those products that use bleach to whiten hurt. Of course, some people are into pain, while others are easy-come, easy-go regarding just about everything that effects them. They surrender to the Tommy Edwards motto, It's All in the Game.


7-15-09... The old saying, "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure" is just as valid in the spiritual life as in the material.

One thing you can't prevent is death, but there's no use worrying about it. How do you know what comes next? Might be something better, or might be nothing at all. Either way, the real tragedy about death is that so many people make money from it by playing on our fears of it. Like stealing our money with threats of a place called hell.

Hank Williams often sang about death, and his life as Hank Williams on this earth ended after a mere 29 years, which adds interest to these lyrics. Tomb of Stone


7-17-09... Victory over every negative condition is not only possible, it is promised. Of course, it is impossible to think this way all the time. Takes a lifetime, or several lifetimes in order to train our mind to remember there is a vast universe surrounding us, and it is far more powerful than any ills contained in our little sphere of misery we create for ourselves... when we forget.

Merle Haggard forgot. Reached for a remedy of limited power before realizing that Tonight, The Bottle Let Me Down.


7-20-09... Leon Rausch joined Bob Wills as his lead singer in 1956. Years later he had a fairly successful solo career, and to this day performs with a western swing band dedicated to keeping the memories and music of Bob Wills alive. In this song, Leon knows good and well that his woman is never going to change, and he tells her how he feels about it. Dim Lights, Thick Smoke


7-22-09... We cannot allow any organization, any institution, any book, any man or woman, to come between us and our direct search for god... god, as in the universe, or universal power, terms exchangeable, meaning the same thing.

Tommy Collins, real name Leonard Sipes, never achieved great fame, but many of the songs he wrote did. Coming from Oklahoma in 1953, he created the foundation for what would become known as the Bakersfield sound... as in California. His songs are known because men who would achieve fame years later cut their chops in Tommy's recording sessions of 1953-4, 1963-4, and considered him a great friend. Chief among them, Buck Owens, Ferlin Husky, Glen Campbell, Wynn Stewart and Merle Haggard. Merle even wrote and recorded a biographical song about him, called Leonard. Here's one from Tommy's 1953 session: You Just Better Not Do That.


7-24-09... Now that we're past all the hangups over the word god, and we can scientifically apply the power of god/universe, let's think about the possibilities. God/universe is bigger than any problem. God in you is bigger than any difficulty facing you. You worship god in you by trusting it over all other outer conditions, and you worship it by recognizing its presence everywhere, in all people and all circumstances.

As with any undertaking, if you're going try this god thing, you might as well go all the way. That's the only way it can work. In 1963, Norma Jean felt that way about the man she'd been flirting with, so she sang it. Let's Go All the Way. Speaking of way, I sure like the way her guitar player starts out her song. It's way purdy in a twangy kind of way.


7-27 thru 31-09... I've got some vacation daze to use, and by god I'm going to use them. Will be back in August, but will leave with this: to achieve goal of successful living, build up the mental equivalent that you want, and get rid of what you do not want.

We've all heard of Christmas in July, well, here's a Christmas song in July. Not really, it's an alcoholic parody of a Christmas song. Take a journey through twelve days of a bad mixture, with funny lady Fay McKay's The Twelve Daze of Christmas.



To see album covers related to some of this music, visit

Uncle Jasper's Old-Timey Music Store



Link to posts for Feb. 2009

Link to posts for March 2009

Link to posts for June 2009





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